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Ein Ayah (Gemara Shabbat 32b)
Speak to the children of Israel and tell them to make for themselves fringes on the corners of their garments, throughout their generations, and they shall affix a thread of techeilet on the fringe of each corner. (Bamidbar 15:38)
After the mitzvah of mezuzah, the Torah states (Devarim 11:21) “So that your days and the days of your children be lengthened upon the land that G-d swore to give to your forefathers…” Rabbi Meir and Rabbi Yehuda disagreed about how to understand these verses. According to one of them, a person’s children are stricken when he neglects the mitzvah of mezuzah. The other derives from a different verse (in Jeremiah)[1]that a person’s children are stricken when he neglects the mitzvah of tzitzit. (Gemara Shabbat 32b)
This teaching of our Sages is puzzling. Of all the mitzvot in the Torah, why are mezuzah and tzitzit singled out for such severe punishment? We would expect that kind of punishment for violating a negative commandment. But these are positive commandments, whose neglect is generally regarded as a missed opportunity, and not something deserving of terrible punishment!
As Jewish parents, it is crucially important that we raise our children to a love of Torah, to a sense of its sanctity and majesty. There are many ways to teach these lessons, but one in particular is fundamental. When children see their parents pridefully and publicly carrying the banner of Torah and mitzvot, they realize the high regard in which matters of holiness are held. It shows them that the Torah’s sanctity is not an abstract ideal, but one that infuses their parents’ very being.
Unfortunately, the opposite is true when children sense that their parents are ashamed to observe mitzvot in public. Even if those same mitzvot are faithfully kept in the privacy of the home, the parents’ lack of public regard for mitzvot puts the spiritual development of their children on a compromised foundation. They are set on a trajectory of spiritual mediocrity at best, and total repudiation of Torah at worst.
It turns out that there are two ways to publicly demonstrate your commitment to mitzvah observance. One of them actually plays out at home. Does your house advertise your dedication G-d? When guests and outsiders come to visit, is your loyalty to mitzvot hidden out of shame or displayed with pride? However, a higher level is when one takes their affinity for kedushah beyond the walls of their home and out into the public domain.
These two approaches are encapsulated by the mitzvot of mezuzah and tzitzit. Themezuzahis placed on the outside of a Jewish home, and calls out to all passersby – ‘This is a Jewish home, a home that conducts all its concerns and affairs in accordance with the Divine Torah, and G-d’s spirit rests herein!’ Tzitzit advertise one’s religious commitment more broadly, literally wherever one’s feet carry him. Tzitzit shows that their wearer is committed not only to the principle of mitzvah observance, but to their implementation in daily life. Furthermore, unlike mezuzah, which symbolizes faithfulness to Torah in a general sense, tzitzit are for us to “remember and perform all [emphasis added] My commandments and… be holy to your G-d” (Devarim 15:40). Tzitzit demonstrate a commitment to the totality of mitzvah observance, with all of its details and intricacies.
We are now able to answer our earlier questions on the teaching of Rabbi Meir and Rabbi Yehuda. Yes, children can be stricken for their parents’ neglect of mezuzah and tzitzit– but that is not simply a punishment. It is the natural outcome of an upbringing that casts mitzvah observance as a source of shame instead of pride, as something to conceal instead of our most prized possession.[2]
And this is why Rabbi Meir and Rabbi Yehuda single out the mitzvot of mezuzah and tzitzit. The punishment they are discussing is not for neglecting any particular mitzvah per se, but for failure to model Torah observance as a matter of pride. That idea is uniquely encapsulated by mezuzah and tzitzit, as we have explained.
Food for Thought
Mishnah Berurah (Orach Chaim 8:26): Those people who place their tzitzit inside their pants act improperly. It is not enough that they ignore the fact that the Torah states ‘and you shall see it and remember,’ but in addition they show contempt for the mitzvah of Hashem…. They will be accountable for this in the future.… If they would have received some gift from a king of flesh and blood on which the name of the king is engraved, how proudly would they always adorn themselves with it in front of other people. All the more so should they wish to adorn themselves with tzitzit, which alludes to the name of the supreme king of kings, the Holy One blessed be He.”
Rabbi Avraham Posner (Chabad.com): The great Kabbalist, Rabbi Isaac Luria (the Arizal, 1534-1572), would wear his tallit kattan, tzitzit and all, under his other garments… Rabbi Chaim Vital explained that this was because the tallit kattan represents the internal level [of reality] and is therefore worn within other garments, while the tallit gadol represents the external [level of reality] and is therefore worn over the other garments. In a published talk, the [Lubavitcher] Rebbe elucidated this concept, explaining that in the “external reality” of the talit gadol, when the Torah says to see the tzitzit, it means actual, external visibility, because this will affect your external behavior, keeping you from sin and reminding you to fulfill all the mitzvahs. In the “internal reality” of the tallit kattan, however, seeing the tzitzit means looking internally towards your own inner self, carrying yourself to a higher level of spirituality and fulfillment of the mitzvahs.
Racheli Malek-Buda (“Will My Children Remain Religious?”): [O]n Friday evening in the yishuv, when I heard Shabbos zemirosbursting from one of the houses on my street. It was a rare event. I assume that my neighbors were having a Really Really Orthodox family over if they allowed themselves to just…sing zemiros in the middle of the night. Because in our friend group, zemirosaren’t really a part of the Shabbos table anymore.
Where have the zemiros gone? I asked myself. We eat together, make Kiddush together, Shabbos is still Shabbos. But the tunes have slowly dissipated over the years, replaced by witty conversation or political debate. They went from being a natural ritual we simply couldn’t go without, to some bothersome task we couldn’t wait to get rid of. Why should we stop the fun just to sing D’ror Yikra? That sort of thought could get you officially labeled a party pooper. When my son wanted to enroll in a religious high school, they announced there’d be a Judaism exam. “Say,” I wondered suddenly on our way to his test. “Do you even know Al HaMichya by heart?” Of course he didn’t. After all, the perfectly Orthodox-lite family he grew up in doesn’t force the kids to bentch anymore….
And suddenly I can understand my father, who insisted we sit next to the table and sing zemiros, no exceptions. He understood what I’m beginning to understand now: that you can’t introduce a way of life without repetitive and deliberate assimilation. You can’t raise the next generation on episodic folklore. Annoying as it sounds, there’s no way to instill substantial religiosity in your children without a pinch of forcefulness or requiring a certain sacrifice.
Questions for Reflection and Discussion
- Read the excerpt from Racheli Malek-Buda above. Are the shortcomings she identifies the same as those Rav Kook sees as symbolized by mezuzah/tzitzit, or are they different?
- Is publicly advertising one’s religious commitment always a good thing? If not, why not?
- What small thing could you do differently to publicly demonstrate – to the broader world or to your children – pride in Torah and mitzvot?
- Can we apply Rav Kook’s ideas to wearing a kippah in public? To showing pride in Jewish identity in general, without any specific connection to mitzvah observance? Why or why not?
- The Torah says that tzitzit are for us to see and be reminded to observe the mitzvot. Rav Kook focuses on their message to the broader world. Is this a contradiction?
- Other than mezuzah and tzitzit, what other mitzvot publicly ‘advertise’ a person’s loyalty to Torah?
- Do a father and mother have the same or different roles in educating children to pride in mitzvahobservance? If they are different, why and how so?
[1] ירמיהו ב:ל – ׳גם בכנפיך נמצאו דםנ פשות אביונים נקיים.׳ רש׳י על הגמ׳ – בשביל כנפיך שבטלת מצותם נמצאו עליך חובת דם נפשות אביונים נקיים בנים קטנים שלא חטאו.
[2] Yes, children who grow up in that kind of home have free will, but the odds are stacked against them, and that is why they are stricken, as a means of quarantining the spiritual damage that their parents have inflicted.
